Six Months and Counting

It's exactly six months ago today since my brother's death. But for me, it was only like yesterday when I cried out loud in the hospital's emergency room. Even the words of my uncle informing me that he's gone are still ringing in my ears.

Six months ago, I was a very lonely and pained soul. I can't talk without crying... I was wishing that everything is just a dream and when I wake up the next day, I'll see my brother sleeping in his bed. But alas! Even if I close my eyes and try to sleep, all I can see is his face while trying to make myself believe that he is forever gone. Those were the days when I think of just crying for the rest of my life.

Six months after... I'm still the pained soul who cries from time to time when the memories remind me of how painful it is to lose someone. But thankfully, I'm no longer a lonely soul. I've found my way back to my old cheery self... thanks to family and friends who show me so much love. I realized that grieving over someone's death is little less painful when family and friends are around to help.

Now if only there is a way for me to find out that he is happy... :D

One Question and An Answer

Just when I'm all set to start doing my task early this morning, a chat message window pops up on my screen all of a sudden - it's from a guy on the workstation far away from mine. :P Knowing him, I thought what he sent me are links to goofy videos or images. But the videos aren't what I thought them to be. They are actually interesting videos that can make you think of what will be your answer when asked with the same question, "where do you wanna wake up tomorrow?"

Fifty People, One Question: London

Fifty People, One Question: Brooklyn

Before watching the videos, I have nothing in mind as to what I wanna see the moment I opened my eyes after a good night's sleep. But after watching and a few hours of contemplating, there is one thing that keeps coming back on my mind - to wake up in a room with wide windows overlooking the sea. As I open the window to let the sunshine in, fresh air come rushing making me feel free and alive. Breakfast should be waiting for me either on the porch or by the seashore. While I wouldn’t mind eating alone, it would be more fun if I'd be sharing it with people close to my heart. Eating breakfast at the beach and spending time with someone you love to talk to is I think one of the most relaxing moments in the world.

So to sum it all up, combination of beach, food and good company... That's what I want!

Thanks to that guy for sharing... :P

Ever the Same

I admit I am not blessed with singing prowess nor you can let me sing in front of others even my friends. I only sing when I'm at home with my family because I'm kinda used to them picking on me when my voice gets croaky. But even if music doesn't like me that much, the way it changes my mood is so amazing. When I'm down or annoyed, listening to Green Day, Matchbox Twenty, Alanis, The Cranberries and other alternative rock artists in full volume can make me feel a bit better.

I can listen to their songs all day everyday - one of the songs is Ever the Same by Rob Thomas. It saved me from insanity more than three years ago and until now, I always turn to it when I feel so alone, helpless and so down. The lyrics hit me straight to the point plus the fact that Rob Thomas is freaking handsome.

Rob Thomas - New Music - More Music Videos

We were drawn from the weeds
We were brave like soldiers
Falling down under the pale moonlight
You were holding to me
Like someone broken
And I couldn't tell you but I'm telling you now

Just let me hold you while you're falling apart
Just let me hold you and we'll both fall down

Fall on me
Tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you forever in me
Ever the same

We would stand in the wind
We were free like water
Flowing down
Under the warmth of the sun
Now it's cold and we're scared
And we've both been shaken
Hey, look at us
Man, this doesn't need to be the end

Just let me hold you while you're falling apart
Just let me hold you and we'll both fall down

Fall on me tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you
Forever in me
Ever the same
Call on me
I'll be there for you and you'll be there for me
Forever it's you
Forever in me
Ever the same

You may need me there
To carry all your weight
But you're no burden I assure
You tide me over
With a warmth I'll not forget
But I can only give you love

Fall on me tell me everything you want me to be
Forever with you
Forever in me
Ever the same
Call on me
I'll be there for you and you'll be there for me
Forever it's you
Forever in me
Ever the same

Forever with you
Forever in me
Ever the same(Ever the same)

4D Puzzle: A Love at First Sight

Today is supposed to be my rest day since I wasn't able to rest yesterday for various reasons. But since this day's activity has been planned a few days ago, I gladly joined my family for some kiddie bonding. After the bump cars adventures, rides, foods and other kiddie activities, we went to Toy Kingdom to look for that remote control helicopter my cousin promised his kid.

While there, I look around hoping that I can find some nice stress balls for myself and my office buddy (a promise I made him ages ago). I was a bit disappointed for not finding a single stress ball in there but then something on the glass display caught my attention - miniature animals and other figures like the toys my nephews are playing. At closer look, the toys are not traditional figurines but are actually 3D puzzle building blocks. One toy is consist of multiple parts to form a figurine. According to their website, the toys are called 4D because they are 3 "D" imensions + "D" etails. They were created around 1998 but I only learned about them just now. :D

I know this type of toy is not only fun but mentally challenging as well. Puzzle in 4D... cool, right? I want to get one but then I promised that I will not use my card on unnecessary purchases so those dragons have to wait.